The Script - No Sound Without Silence Tour

Last Wednesday, my friends and I had the amazing opportunity to watch The Script live at the Rod Laver Arena. I didn't have any expectations for the concert, but I knew beforehand that the band was well-known for throwing ridiculously good ones.

T-5 days to the concert, I found myself furiously memorising every single song that was in their line-up. I didn't want to miss out on a single lyric, not after my experience at the Ed Sheeran concert a month earlier.

Pre concert, looking highly excited!!

We didn't purchase General Admission tickets seeing as we were old women, but I have to say I regret not doing so. My feet were thankful, but I think The Script is worth a GA ticket for the next round.

The concert was amazing. I enjoyed every single second of it. I was on a sugar high the entire night but blood was coursing through my veins throughout. The songs were perfectly performed, plus the Script and all their Irish beauty were 'blerdy entertainin' the entire two hours!! The best part yet was when Danny performed a song for an ex-boyfriend from one member of the audience. The guy hung up towards the end but Danny called back and called him an asshole for putting it down. It was great!! If I were on the other end, I'd just be enjoying the free song to be honest.

It's been close to a week but I'm still suffering from post-concert withdrawals. I've been replaying the entire line-up over and over again. The Script is definitely a band you should watch live. I value bands that are able to engage the entire crowd as well as they did. Plus their songs are amazing, what else is there to that??

We had a bloomin' good time The Script!!!!!! Please come back soon, I'll definitely go for your concert again.

Photo credits: Myself and Megan Lim (general admission).

xx.

An emotional night.

Image credits: Pinterest

I've always marvelled at the human body's ability to feel. To be able to feel is such a wonderful thing. Yet it's such a love-hate relationship we have with it.

I love having the ability to feel. Simply put, I feel much more human that way. On nights like these though, sometimes I wish I had the ability to hold it, put it on pause or numb certain feelings. One main problem that comes with a very strong ability to feel emotion is allowing it to take over.

I replay these thoughts in my head, and it's not looking to be a very promising night. Very often I end up staring at my computer, refreshing the same page over and over again, and then waste time thinking about thoughts that are beyond my control.

Sigh, if only life were a lot easier sometimes huh? Guess it's just going to be one of those nights... :(

Time to bring out some chamomile tea. Hopefully it'll ease me into sleeping.
xx

A lil note from me to you;

Image Credits: Facebook

You are beautiful just the way you are :) Just a little end of the week quote for anyone who might be feeling a lil' down in the dumps. Remember to keep on smiling because you never know who's day you're making with that beautiful smile :)

Xx.

Be kind... to yourself.

Photo credits: C

The weekend after Easter has arrived and just like that, the mid semester break is about to come to a close. I can't say I've had a boring week, it was exciting in it's own little way but I was able to get a lot of relaxation through it all.

Over the past few days I've been thinking about the things we think we deserve. The most common phrase that comes to mind with these words has to be: "We accept the love we think we deserve". But I think it transcends just love, there are so many more aspects in life that we feel we do or do not deserve.

I have very often struggled to come to terms with myself. People around me see the good sides of me, and even if they see the bad sides they're still able to put up with those flaws and love me all the same. Seeing as how we're our harshest critic, I found it difficult to accept my flaws. I don't mean physical flaws, I'm leaning towards emotional and (perhaps) psychological flaws.

A friend told me that we have three different personalities. Our public, personal and private personalities. Public refers to the personality we take on when we meet people. Personal refers to the personality we have amongst our close group of friends. Private of course, refers to our personality when we're alone.

Understanding things this way makes it a lot easier to see why we may seem to have multiple identities. One issue I had with myself was feeling like a hypocrite. You know, you're smiling on the outside and saying positive things yet inside you're thinking otherwise. How do you live with yourself like that? It could just be me, I've never believed in being hypocritical towards people in that sense. If I don't like someone I don't put myself out of my way to be friendly with the person. I still respect them though, I just don't make effort in wanting to get closer to them.

You may be wondering where this post is headed to. Fret not, I just asked myself a similar question haha.

In a nutshell, I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you ever feel like you're undeserving of something, you're never going to be truly happy. We have to learn to accept that we have different personalities and that the thoughts in our head were meant to be in our head for a reason. Unless the thoughts you hold comprise of you wanting to kill someone (in the literal sense of the word), then don't hate yourself too much for it. Such thoughts once in a while is common and you should still love yourself despite these.

So if you've ever felt like you're undeserving of something, hit yourself on the head and take that back. If good things come to you, be grateful and give thanks and embrace the moment as it comes. That is all :)

... I should really work on explaining my posts properly. Such abstract thoughts lead to jumbled up sentences.

xx

Farewell March, you've been kind enough.

I can't believe it's already the end of March! A quarter of the year has gone by just like that, and even though I know this phrase is used way too often, I still wonder: "Where has the time gone??".

March has been a rather interesting albeit tumultuous month. Started the month with school, made a promise to myself for change, failed in some aspects but I have to remind myself that I have to keep on trying. Has this happened to anyone else? You know, you make a promise to yourself to change some aspect of your life but you end up failing. And it's not such a big failure too - although at times the consequences may be rather big - but you deny yourself any form of pleasure because you know you don't deserve it. You beat yourself up harshly and it takes you nowhere but this huge downward spiral that doesn't promise a way out. Well, that was me then and I know that I have to forgive myself yet at the same time punish myself too for misbehaving and failing to carry out what I had promised. I don't know why I fall back into this same pattern, things go well and just as it's about to turn into a habit I give in and it's back to square one. Take deep breaths, stand up straight and march forward. That's all I have to do.

Anyway, the month soon progressed on and before I knew it the second week saw me gracing my birthday with loved ones here down under. It reminded me that love and friendship is always nearby and to count my blessings. School continued, and the weather continued to be in my favour too. I'm always a happy goober here when the weather chooses to be happy too :) (in other words, lots of sunshine and cool breezes).

Towards the end of the month things took a turn. My former Prime Minister passed away and for a long time up till now I am still mourning his death. I believe I have said all that I wanted to in my previous post, but I forgot to mention the unity I felt amongst the people of my country throughout the entire week leading up to the procession of his death. Never have I felt so united as one with the people of my country, bearing the same thoughts as well as worries for what lies ahead in the future. It was a time that I found no comfort being around people who weren't from Singapore because the truth was none of my friends from other countries would understand or feel the same amount of grief as I did. I suppose it's the same elsewhere. I won't deny that my grief over the death of the late Princess Diana ever surmounted to the level of the people of England. That is to say, neither do I treat the late Lee Kuan Yew as a king, I'm merely expressing my inability in expressing and sharing my grief with those who may not understand.

That said, there is light at the end of the tunnel and albeit the sadness that clouded the air, there were some good things too. Firstly, I think I most probably exhausted myself by attending three concerts over three consecutive days. Attended the Miranda Sings concert with a friend, watched Cirque De Soleil with a group of friends and finally, attended Ed Sheeran's concert with some friends too :) I enjoyed myself thoroughly at all three events, and it definitely helped to perk me up from all that sadness.

Anyway, here are some photos from the past week :

I fangirled a whole lot that night. I love Miranda so much, she's my inner soul. 

We customised our own t-shirts!! It was so much fun dressing up pre-concert with my girls, it made the whole experience a  lot more fun :)

And, randoms snippets from the week:

Love the smoothies from Five Plus Smoothies!! So delicious and filling. It's slightly pricey so I only ever purchase it if I've gone through a really good workout at the gym. Plus, it doesn't help my case much considering it's located just next to my gym...

Yummy gelato from Dex2Rose, a nitrogen gelato store co-owned by my friend. I'm not being biased, but I genuinely love the gelato from his store a lot more as compared to the others that I've tried. The flavours suited my palate, the price was reasonable and the location is fantastic. 

In case you wanted to know where it's located, here's the address:

Dex2Rose Nitrogen Gelato

377 Little Bourke Street

 Melbourne VIC 3000 

I love waking up to this view :)

Well, I guess that's it for March. I will be ending this month with another delightful meeting at Toastmasters and then perhaps getting groceries because I am starving myself at home due to the absence of food. Tomorrow shall be the start of a new month, and hopefully the continuation of good habits and the start of better ones.

Hope you've had a lovely March, and I hope you're as excited as I am for the coming weeks to come! :)
Xx

RIP Lee Kuan Yew.

Source: Pinterest

I contemplated writing this post over and again for various reasons. However, I felt that I needed to address his death and give respect to this man who moulded and shaped the beautiful country I call home.

Before I begin, please, to anyone who may be reading this post (Singaporean or not), please know that there is no political intent behind this post. With all the posts that are coming up online - both good and bad - I just merely wanted to express my feelings towards his death. 

I grew up in Generation Y. I was old enough to only remember Goh Chok Tong as my Prime Minister. At that point in time, the late Lee Kuan Yew was the Minister Mentor for the country. However, I definitely grew up learning about Lee Kuan Yew and the contributions he did for the country. As a child in primary school, these pieces of information were too much for me to process. My inability to understand political lingo disabled me from fully understanding the extent of the history of Lee Kuan Yew and Singapore. So like a child that is taught what is left and right, I accepted the fact that he had to be respected because he had sacrificed a lot for the country.

Growing up, my family was never one that discussed political issues. Neither did we ever complain or compliment the government. The only time the government came up was when new policies were made. That said, within my family some of us share different political views. We don't force one another to agree with our views on certain issues. Neither do we force one another to support a particular political party. My understanding of the government and its political ideologies were shaped from my personal education as well as debates and discussions I had watched and had with my peers. 

However, as I grew up I learned some things about Lee Kuan Yew that I ultimately did not like and at some point wish I never discovered. Some decisions he made in the past questioned my respect for him. The wall that had separated the child and adult in me was broken and I now realised the reality of what it really was. I questioned why he carried them out. As the say, you can't make quick judgments when it comes to politics without reading from a wide spectrum of articles. I had to carry out my own research to at least try to understand why he did what he did.

Source: Google Images

At the time this happened, I was in high school. By then, I had been given the opportunity to take up leadership roles. It was through this that I came to realise that being a leader is no easy feat. One is not born a leader but rather moulded into one. Your beliefs make you the effective leader you are but above all, choosing the make the right (albeit unpopular) decision is another. I was a leader in my school, Lee Kuan Yew was a leader in a country. The impact of the decisions made in parliament weighs so much heavier than the ones I ever made in school. I respected him, and slowly began to understand why he may have carried out those unpopular decisions in the past. He was not perfect, but his tenacity, passion and willpower towards a brighter future for Singapore is something that cannot go unnoticed. At the end of the day, I now have a home that provides me with security, opportunities as well as a vibrant culture that makes it uniquely Singapore - my home. 

Ultimately, everyone faces death. The mistakes he may have made towards people in the past is not for me to judge but is between him and his Creator. As a human being, I mourn his death and am terribly saddened by his departure. The world has lost one of their best leaders. The context in which he led my country may not have been similar to other notable world leaders across the globe, but he definitely was a man that deserves every ounce of respect that comes his way.

***

When I was 10 I found a book in my school library about Lee Kuan Yew. It was a book that described his past, from childhood to prime minister. It was a simplified and illustrated version for children. But one thing was for sure. I knew then and there that there was no reason to not respect him. A man who treats his wife like a Queen and who loves her so dearly as he did is a man of great character. That in itself spoke great volumes of him. 

Source: Google Images

‘For reasons of sentiment, I would like part of my ashes to be mixed up with Mama’s, and both her ashes and mine put side by side in the columbarium. We were joined in life and I would like our ashes to be joined after this life.’ (Source: The Sunday Times , October 2, 2011)

Thank you Lee Kuan Yew. Your contributions to the country will definitely be shared to the generations to come. I am honoured and grateful to have lived when you did. You have taught me so much as a leader and for all that you have gone through, I will always respect you. 

Source: Google Images

May you rest in peace.

Updates + Writers Block

Source: Me

The term "writer's block" has never been more applicable to me today than less than half a year ago when I decided to make this blog. It's one thing to be blogging about your personal life and another when it comes to blogging about things that you genuinely want to share about. Pardon me for expressing my woes with regards to this platform once again, but at the current moment I'm still so lost as to what I want this space to be. An inspirational platform? Suits the wishy washy me very well. A beauty platform? I do love my products and I love to share some of the tips that I find have worked for me. That said it's not every day I'll have something beauty related to share. Hmm.. I'll need to figure this out sometime soon.

Meanwhile, the plague that's taken over my creative juices has me worried. Why do I lack inspiration? It's true that most of the inspiration behind my posts come from personal encounters and experiences. I wondered if my lack of inspiration possibly signified me being in a good place in my life at the moment.

Living overseas has been quite a tumultuous ride for me and be it unfortunate or not, i'm still going through the ride. As i've mentioned in a previous post, 2014 was a terrible year for me after experiencing depression and anxiety. There was no doubt that 2015 frightened me to bits prior to my departure from home and my family. You never really know what life has in store for you, you can only pray for the best really.

Well, as far as I can say, life has been treating me well so far :) Albeit it only being three weeks since I've been away from home, I can safely say that I am genuinely happy. It may be too bold of me to say that I'm the happiest I've been in a long while since my trip overseas with my family, but it certainly comes close. Friends who are no longer down under with me are still in my mind, but their departure has allowed others to make way into my life. Acquaintances are now friends, and friends are now good friends. The biggest contributing factor to my happiness here definitely has to be the club I'm involved with in Uni, it takes up most of my time in all the good ways possible :)

However, the sole reason why I know I'm as happy and grateful as I am now lies in only one reason - faith. I don't like talking about religion on public platforms like these in general because I understand that not everyone believes in the same thing as I do. Needless to say - and in no way are my intentions to preach - faith has helped me to overcome all the darkness that has plagued me the previous year. I lacked prayer and faith the year before, and despite knowing it was an issue still lacked the discipline to change my habits. I promised myself I'd put my faith above everything else this year, and to strive to be a better person of my religion. Like said, it's only been three weeks but I'm confident of proving myself wrong that I'll fail to accomplish this.

Source: Pinterest

Truly, there are so many things I'm afraid of. But with faith + hard work, I know I'll get there eventually :) 

Anyway, here are some snippets from what I've been up to the past three weeks:

(L-R): Frozen Yogurt from Yo-chi, Hotcakes from The Kettle Black, Charlie's old fashioned Quencher, brunch from Mart 130

Also, I turned 22 last Friday! Happy Belated Birthday to me :) Unfortunately (and I hate myself so much for this) I have no photos from that night!! :( I had a wonderful and lovely day nonetheless, and it was perfect just the way I liked it with people I treasure in my life. Perhaps I'll share a little bit more about my birthday celebration in another post. 

Till then, have a lovely week ahead and I'll see this space very soon :)

xx

Sick!?

Source: Pinterest

Howdiddlydoo. A lot has happened since my last visit here - I took a plane back to Australia, school started, I met up with friends, attended meetings... and the most recent addition to the list is contracting shingles!! 

I don't want to get down to the nitty-gritty details of my illness, but after my visit to the doctor today concluded that I currently have shingles and am on medication until I've completed it.

The reason behind the image above is because I was complaining to my parents about how I happen to fall gravely ill / injure myself / contract a new illness / spoil my phone when I am away from home. My mum responded with the above message (also tied it to the obstacles and failures that I had to overcome). 

So on the bright side, falling sick has definitely made me less reliant on my parents. Cause there ain't no way my mum's gna be able to take care of me and feed me when she's so far away :'( It is true, you miss home when you fall ill. Furthermore, I think I should add that my doctor was impressed that I had the same inkling on the diagnosis of my illness. Hooray for me! 

Till then, I'll be busy taking my medicine and hiding that affected area just beneath my ear. 

Xx

How fast do you walk?

Source: Pinterest

As far as resolutions go, one that I have made in particular is with regards to the speed in which I walk. Instead of "resolution", I suppose it's safer to say that it's more of a reminder and a habit that I wish to change.

There are all sorts of speeds in this world. You have those who walk really slowly, those who speed away as if they're engaged in an urgent matter and those who walk at an average speed. 

Now I happen to fall in the second category, especially so when I'm alone. With company I find myself following their pace unless we're in a rush somewhere. That said though, I'm very often leading the group when we're walking... I wonder why. Maybe it's my pace. 

I've come to realise that the speed at which I walk when alone has influenced my life and ultimately my happiness. Firstly, I hardly have time to look at the things around me and consider their beauty given I'm so concentrated in getting to my destination as quickly as possible. Secondly, I most probably appear to be rather haphazard to others given how fast I walk. Walking fast increases your heart rate and though it may prove to be a rather good form of exercise whilst out but it doesn't necessarily portray you in a very good light. I basically found myself feeling awkward whenever I was out alone. 

Simply put, I felt as if my life was a rush and I felt highly unattractive each time I reached my destination. 

This year I told myself I wanted to stop walking so fast all the time. I wanted to change the pace in which I moved around from point to point. I needed to stop feeling so awkward about walking alone. 

Believe it or not, the impact it had on me was dramatic. I felt so much more at ease once I changed my pace. I was able to breathe calmly as opposed to the rapid heartbeats before and this altogether made me feel more relaxed as I walked along the streets. I felt less awkward, less of a haphazard but above all, I felt happy. I should mention now that my slower pace was coupled with a proper posture so this may have played a supporting role as well. 

Why am I sharing this otherwise boring and irrelevant post you ask? Well, because I feel that so many of us today are trapped in this cycle of rushing from place to place that we ignore the beauty of the things around us. Above all, apart from noticing the smaller things in life, the way we walk may inadvertently affect our own happiness. I'm so glad I detected my way of walking as a problem in itself, because I think it could have very well affected me altogether in the long run. 

I do occasionally fall back into my rushed pace and I find that I constantly need to remind myself to slow down and walk properly. I am definitely seeing this habit in a positive light and hope that in the days to come I no longer will need to remind myself anymore. 

Hope this post has enlightened you somehow, feel free to share your thoughts :)

xx

Nostalgia.

Source: Pinterest

I've come to realise as I've grown that social media has grown to be nothing more than an irritant for me. It's like that annoying pimple that turns up even when you don't want it to, but should you poke it leave a scar that may stay for a long time. 

I loved social media as a teenager. Perhaps it had to do with showcasing how perfect and wonderful life was. I remember clearly thinking up of witty captions, trying to use cool filters and applications to spice up my otherwise dull photos. Heck, I'd have already thought of a photo and a caption I wished to upload from an event that would have taken place a week or two later! That's as crazy as I had gone. 

Needless to say, I've soon gotten tired of social media. Tired of having to deal with "humble braggers" (okay I get it, you have hundreds of admirers lining up your door asking for your number), tired of having to see people claim every tom dick and harry to be their "babes"/"girlies"/"baes" (can I use this opportunity now to express my extreme distaste for the term "bae") and above all, people who upload three photos of their other half and the extremely wonderful things they do for each other every single day (you cannot then express your surprise when acquaintances / friends are aware of your break-up). 

I've since gotten rid of my social media. I found myself getting affected by said people above. Thus, instead of harbouring bad feelings towards these people, I've come to follow the mantra that goes "Out of sight, out of mind". That said, there are some platforms that I simply cannot bear to deactivate. Facebook for instance, is one site I know I definitely won't remove from my life. Simply because there are people who I may no longer speak to but would definitely like to remain "in touch" with. I have sent these friends random messages when they cross my mind to ask them how they're doing. Why be afraid if they find you weird right? It's the thought that matters. This reminds me of the article of the individual who met each Facebook friend for coffee to catch up. I wish I had the courage to do that too.

...also facebook is where all my photos (shared by friends) are. I honestly would mourn the day Facebook decides to shut down.

Another platform I know I won't deactivate or remove anytime soon would be instagram. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but instagram has served a very important and special purpose for me. Considering how I'm away from home so often, instagram's served the function of being my comfort during the days I miss home. How, you ask?

You see, each time you view a photo from your profile, the application shows you the number of weeks ago you'd uploaded the photo. I find comfort in the fact that a photo I had uploaded from an event/outing had only taken place a few weeks ago. It sets me in a reminiscent mood and reminds me of the good times that were spent :)

Speaking of which, you may be wondering now what my rambling above has anything to do with the title of the post. Well, I've spent my evening looking through my past photos and a wave of nostalgia hit. Apart from feeling utmost regret at not having put more effort into my daily exercise regiment, I've come to realise how much I've lost the youth and vigour I once had.

It's crazy isn't it? What do you see in your past photos? Apart from seeing my physical self and the objects in the photo, I see and recall the emotions and the thoughts that I had during the time of the event. I wonder if everyone else feels this way when they look at their past photos too. Perhaps this is why two people may look at the same picture, but one with more avid an expression than the other.

I definitely recall the times I've spent and the thoughts that I held in my past pictures. Oh that photo of us tumbling down the hill? I remember the coolness of the air, the sound of the children in the park and the crazy amount of adrenaline that was coursing through our veins as we did it. It's reminded me why I ever turned into an avid photo taking monster in the first place. I hope that I don't ever shy away during times I wish to take a picture of anything in particular, because very often the feeling you've had during that time may not return.

Do you have a particular picture that reminds you of a memorable event? Do share, I'd love to know :)

Till then, have a great mid-week and a happy chinese new year to all who celebrate out there! :)
xx.

Reflect.

The past week has proven that my heart is capable of bearing strong emotions that otherwise would have broken me. You see, I always find myself at a crossroad of not knowing what to do when I'm faced with such situations. Very often my head starts thinking of this space and the things that I would type as I go along but that said, it never actually happens. Eventually I end up consumed by my own thoughts that any attempt in wanting to type out said events don't ever end up coherent. 

... I was also once told that if you're unable to express your thoughts coherently it means it's not yet sorted out in your head. I suppose to some extent that is true.

Where shall we begin?

I was a spectator of an actual fist-pumping fight involving blood last week whilst at work. We were stationed to a school, and was actually pre-empted about the profile of the students we were going to be meeting. Still, never in my life did I expect to be faced with such a situation. Let's just say that at the exact point in time when I heard the loud punch outside from where I was my head was torn into two. A part of me that knew what was going on hesitated and almost prevented doing the right thing and going out to intervene. These were two grown 16 year old boys, and no matter how strong I may have been I knew I was no match for them. I don't know how I managed to muster up the courage to head out to see what happened.

To cut the story short, I never actually knew what started the fight or what actually happened. All I knew was that there was a part of me that felt really sorry because I know I will never actually be able to cross paths with these students again to help them. To be frank, majority of the students from the school came from broken families and judging from what they shared with us it seems that they don't seem to see their teachers as adult figures or role models. Who then do they see as role models if there is no one from their family or school? Their friends? What then if their friends are bad influences?

I don't believe that these 16 year olds I came across with were bad students. No, in fact I can genuinely say that at the end of the entire three days I spent with them I enjoyed their company very much. That said, three days is too short to make a lasting impact for the rest of their lives. The heart of the matter behind their behaviour has not yet been tackled. I should emphasise now that my job does not help students in dealing with their attitude problems.

However, there was one thing that hit me straight home. There was one student who at the onset came  across to be rather rude to me. At the end of the session I remember parting with him and telling him that I saw a great deal of hope in his future if he believed in himself. After all, why would he have remained attentive throughout the three days? I don't think someone who lacked the desire to succeed in his life would have done so.

After relaying my message to him, he approached me shortly after asking for a photo and exclaimed to his friends that I was the first person to have told him he had a chance of doing well. It honestly took me a lot of effort to stop myself from tearing up.

Source: Pinterest

All it takes sometimes is one small gesture to change someone's lives. I may not have been able to reach everyone last week but I truly did love the students and I genuinely see them achieving excellence in the future if they take the right steps to get there. Above all, it reminded me about the dreams I have for the future in helping the youth in my community and why I do what I do. The purpose is there, but how can I take it one step further?

I may not remember names very well, but I do remember faces. And I know I won't forget the faces of those I met last week. I pray for their success.

xx.